Dear Little Spider, 02-06-2017
The last time that I wrote you I was still a child, struggling to remember what you did. I refused to dig into my memories to convict you. I was exactly where you wanted me to be. This time is different.
Today I am exactly where you promised I would be, and doing exactly what you told me you dreamed of us doing, but without you. I am living my dreams. I am finally free of the pain that stole more from my spirit than from my body, and in less than a month you will never have touched any part of my body. You were sick, and I pray Jesus has healed your soul over time. You were cold, hard, vindictive, deceitful and scary; however, I pray God has moved inside of you and fundamentally changed you.
Some days I want to sit and talk to you. I want to understand why your brain told you that this was okay. I never will, and I have come to peace with that too.
I am finally okay with my past, and I can finally prove that I have forgiven you. I would like to thank you for making me look crazy every year. Thank you for teaching me not to feel, and in turn how to express the deepest emotional pain so beautifully. I can finally write this book, and stop another young girl from feeling so alone. I will not use your name nor any details that can identify you to anyone else, but you will know that it is you I have written about.
Sincerely,
The Girl You Turned Into a Woman Far Too Young
The fly who escaped your web
The girl who rode the waves
Me
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